8/16/26: Don't Wake The Bear

When we awoke the weather was perfectly calm and the reflection of the mountains in the mirror-like water brought about by the calm was perhaps my favorite view from the whole trip so far. We set out for our hike around 7 am, landing at the head of the fjord to the sounds of Skip yelling at us from the boat not to do so as it meant we had to carry the shore barrel to the high sides of the river from the head. Despite this, we were in high spirits brought about by excitement for the hike to come and the sheer beauty of the morning. The first part of the hike was following a small, trickling river that ran between the mountains. The terrain was sand carried down by the river, speckled with rocks and small bushes. There were 10–15 foot crests every 200–600 feet, which meant the terrain only revealed itself to us in 200–600 foot segments. We crested five or six of these steps, each time being rewarded with a new bit of scenery. These new bits of scenery were typically overshadowed by the looming cliffs and larger views, so we spent much of our time looking up rather than near around us. That being said, there still were interesting things to look at closer to us, such as tiny but very well-defined animal tracks in the sand and bushes, little berries that speckled the ground, river rapids that rushed alongside us, and the occasional notable rocks. One such notable rock was a very large white rock alongside the river. Mostly white with tan and brown patches, it appeared much like many other white rocks we'd seen on this trip. Once I brought it to everyone's attention, we couldn't quite take our eyes off of it. The texture was wrong, it wasn't solid enough, and the vegetation around it was all flat. We started to suspect it wasn't a rock and moved back to the nearest bluff where we had around 300 ft between us and the rock. From there I started digging through my bag for my drone to fly over to the rock and scout it out. As I started to turn on my drone, surrounded by a ring of the contents of my bag, I heard a squeak and a yelp from Helene followed by an attempt at a hushed, "It just moved, it just f@!#ing moved!" Just as she said so, the rock—a very large polar bear, as it happened to be—lifted its head and turned it towards us. This led to Helene, in the mentality of "just don't be last," getting a head start on getting away from the bear as I frantically repacked my bag and passed Nathan the action camera. Bag packed, he and I slowly went to join Helene behind the first bluff. The last thing we saw of the polar bear was it walking towards us, so once it was out of sight, we all sprinted to the nearest more defensible location. We repeated this process of running out from under the bluffs and then slowing down once it might be able to see us all the way back to the shore where Skip was there to pick us up. We never saw the bear again. Sadly, we had to abandon both our beautiful anchorage and hike in hopes of pastures less beary. We found another nice, but less striking anchorage where we got to take a second attempt at a longer hike, this time over a few peaks before getting chased off the mountain by bugs. We didn't try a third time, but instead had a fantastic hearty bean soup, watched one of my favorite movies, Duma, and called it a night.

I forgot to include this when I wrote it stuck in the button islands but it fits pretty well here too:

Little bear hungry and trim

I'm sure these new visitors look awfully tasty

So let me help you

As captain

Here is the order you should eat us in:

You might think Jenifer

But you're being to hasty

She's bundled warm in lots of layers

A mouth full of fabric won't answer your prayers

Dede

He looks about right

But you're wrong again and in for a fright

He carries a knife

Scrappy and resilient

He's ready for a fight

Skip

He's next

Tall

Seasoned from the Antarctic winds sprinkled on thick

But I tell you you'll regret it

He's the one with the boom stick

Myself

Captain of the ship

I'm sure I look like a full meal

No tricks, knives, or guns at my hip

But I warn you

Covered in oil and diesel my flavor is sure to make you keel

Nathan and Helene

They're the last

I promise one is sure to end your fast

Nathan

He's quick

If you're not watchful he's most likely to give you the slip

But Helene

Muscles is her name

In a fight her Norwegian might

might well be your shame

So honestly my advice would be to leave us all

Look forward to the seals when they arrive after fall

But a deals a deal

I want to be someone you can have faith in

So out of us all

If I were you

I'd eat Nathan